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I almost missed the email regarding overnight respite as I was rushing around on a busy Saturday. It was from Justin\u2019s new camp, a haven for developmentally disabled adults and children not too far from where we live. It is both a day and overnight camp, with specific weekends and weeks allocated throughout the year for autistic individuals. Justin has successfully attended day camp there this summer, with another stint coming up during his second summer school hiatus coming up at the end of August.<\/p>\n
My heart soared as I read the email, thinking of the potential opportunity for Justin to someday sleep over at the camp. I don\u2019t know if he\u2019ll be able to handle it, but I know if he does well his last three days this summer that we\u2019ll be looking into a weekend this school year, a decision we will make as much for us as for him.<\/p>\n
My boy needs to learn to sleep somewhere other than his own bed.<\/p>\n
Back in the day when he was little Justin slept over my mom\u2019s house, but at a certain point he stopped wanting to do that, and we stopped trying. He does sleep in a different bed when we go to Disney every other year, but that is with me in the bed next to him, so in my mind it doesn\u2019t really count. The truth is someday he\u2019ll be sleeping in a home that isn\u2019t his parents\u2019, and I really feel we\u2019ll be doing him a disservice if we don\u2019t try to give him other opportunities to get used to sleeping away from home.<\/p>\n
I could tell you that I think he\u2019ll enjoy it, but that would be a lie.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve always pushed Justin to try new things, even when he initially seemed like he hated the activity. Call it mother\u2019s intuition, but when he was little I just knew that eventually he would like the boardwalk, Great Adventure, and our backyard pool, and I kept trying to help him acclimate to those activities. Eventually, by pairing them with food (who doesn\u2019t like that as a reinforcer!) and gradually lengthening our stays at these locations, Justin got to the point where he loved going out, would unceremoniously drop his shoes at my feet and look at me as if to say \u201cWhere are we going today Mom?\u201d<\/p>\n
I know that he\u2019s grown to enjoy these outings both due to the lack of behaviors when we go out, and also to his smiles when we reach our destination. He\u2019s always ready to go home however, back to the sanctuary of his room, his DVD player, and his forays on YouTube. I know in my heart if we drop him off at camp with a suitcase and his pillow he is going to want to go home at the end of the day, but I think it\u2019s time we pushed him past his comfort zone and gave it a try.<\/p>\n
Believe me, it\u2019s pushing me past my comfort zone as well.<\/p>\n
Justin is sixteen now, just five years away from the conclusion of his school entitlement ending and impending adulthood. As much as a part of me wants to keep him safely cocooned here forever to protect him, I know that\u2019s ultimately not his life trajectory. He won\u2019t like sleeping away from us, but he needs to practice doing it so it will be easier for him to transition out of our home someday to his new one.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s time for me to push him to do something he may not like in an effort to make his transition easier for him down the road.<\/p>\n
So keep your fingers crossed both for him and for me (I don\u2019t know who will be more nervous that weekend), because it\u2019s time to stretch my boy\u2019s limits and see if he can fly.<\/p>\n
And let\u2019s see if his mom can too.<\/p>\n
For more on my family visit my blog at autismmommytherapist.wordpress.com<\/em><\/p>\n Follow me on Facebook at Autism Mommy-Therapist<\/em><\/p>\n